More than six months have already passed after having joined the PhD at this university. Sometimes things seem to be moving in a right direction but sometimes they seem to go awry. Sometimes I feel happy with my work and sometimes I feel as if it is not worth anything. Sometimes planning works and sometimes planning fails to plan itself. I feel there is a need of proper planning once again and I need to recognize my priorities once again. I need to define the time frames and deadlines for the task. I also need to work out the plans ahead as they would define the boundaries of my future work.
Procrastination is the perhaps worst habit which hinders the progress of a PhD student. I seem to have fallen prey of it. I need to get out of it soon otherwise it acts like glue the longer you wait, more powerfully it sticks.
Once more I need to really think of going underground and planning the things with an oath to complete them within given time period.
We all face complicated phases in our life when you really don't know what are you doing and where would it all lead you to. To come out this "feeling blue", I decided to go for a walk along the seaside. Just a few meters away from my home is the sea beach. I was really depressed and that's why decided to go out for a while. It was around 8 in the night. The Sun had already set. The sky was red and sea seemed to be gray. A strong wind was blowing from seaside. I was still thinking about the jobs to be completed in the week that starts tomorrow. Small boulders and pebbles were telling me that you need to take rest and go underground cutting yourself from rest of the world. People who were passing by were staring at me and my face. They might be thinking why this guy was so tensed. Though I could not revive my body by this short walk by the seaside, I was able to think clearly what to do next. What I decided was to go underground for a few days in order to check whether it helps. Let's go underground.
Just heard a word from one of the administration people sitting and casually chatting just beside my office space. Of course they are Britons and the word 'Darling' is from their own language. As and when I heard, I tried to remember the childhood days when using this word used to an offence and especially when it was used by a boy for a girl. When these thoughts came to my mind, only I could see my smile in laptop screen which acts like a mirror when you are in front of it.
It may quite obvious to everybody else but to me my conclusion was a bit new discovery. I concluded that words bear different meanings as they travel from one country to another over time. Darling may be a common word now in India among middle class and understood widely having same connotation as in England but a decade ago it was like a special word which was only used to call your intimate partners. To some extent, credit to such things goes to cinema from where people pick them up without knowing their real meaning and context. They start using it in the same way they have seen it being used in the cinema.